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Her Side: Breaking Bad Habits – s01e07

Join hosts Melissa and Paulette for a powerful episode of HerSide, featuring special guest Coach Lily. This week, we’re tackling the common bad habits that many women struggle with, from imposter syndrome to neglecting self-care. We’ll discuss how we often fail to give ourselves credit, skip basic self-care routines like brushing our teeth because we dive straight into work, and constantly compare ourselves to others.

Coach Lily shares insights on breaking free from these habits, emphasizing the importance of accountability from those close to us, and engaging in soul-searching and self-reflection. We’ll explore how lashing out or blaming others can prevent us from growing and becoming better versions of ourselves.

As we celebrate Independence and Freedom Month this July, let’s focus on breaking free from these bad habits. Tune in to learn practical strategies and empower yourself to live a healthier, more self-aware life.

Don’t miss this inspiring conversation on self-improvement and personal growth. Subscribe now and join the discussion on breaking bad habits, women’s empowerment, overcoming imposter syndrome, and achieving self-care and wellness.

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Facing the Silence: How Confronting Myself Made Me a Stronger Entrepreneur

As an entrepreneur, the hustle often keeps me moving—meetings, decisions, and constant growth. Yet, in rare moments of silence, I realize I’m deflecting, not from the world, but from facing myself. The fear of confronting my vulnerabilities—doubts, insecurities, and failures—often drives me to focus outwardly on metrics and trends rather than looking inward. But when I finally stop deflecting and face myself with courage, I discover an unexpected strength. It’s in those moments of self-awareness that I find greater clarity, creativity, and peace, fueling my leadership and business growth. Confronting my fears has made me a stronger, more fulfilled leader, and I challenge you to do the same.

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Fear Not: Deflection & the Fear of Accountability

Deflection and the fear of accountability often go hand in hand, as avoiding responsibility can feel less threatening than facing uncomfortable truths. Overcoming this fear requires introspection, honesty, and self-awareness. By embracing acceptance, taking ownership of our actions, and reflecting on our thoughts and behaviors, we can break free from deflection. Practicing empathy, seeking feedback, and staying present in challenging situations helps us confront our fears and grow personally. Consistently applying these steps cultivates a mindset of accountability, which is essential for authentic self-growth and building meaningful relationships with others.

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Resilient Without Him

Today, on Father’s Day, I want to speak to those who, like me, have never had a conversation with their biological fathers. While this day can stir emotions of loss and unanswered questions, it’s essential to recognize that your worth is not defined by absence. You are resilient, valuable, and surrounded by love in many forms—whether from family, friends, or mentors. Love isn’t confined to biology. Your journey, shaped by strength and self-discovery, holds the power to inspire others. So today, honor your path, celebrate your growth, and remember: you are more than enough.

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Reflection: On Body Positivity and Gratitude

In a world that often encourages us to focus on perceived flaws, it’s easy to fall into the trap of critiquing our own appearance. We begin the day by zeroing in on the areas we’d like to change, whether it’s our waistline, the fine lines on our face, or those little imperfections we wish could disappear. However, what if we shifted our mindset? Instead of starting the day with self-criticism, let’s begin with gratitude for our bodies. Every day, our bodies do incredible things—things we often take for granted, like moving, breathing, and healing. This November, let’s choose to celebrate the strength, mobility, and resilience that we often overlook, acknowledging the everyday blessings of our health and fitness. Whether it’s walking, playing, or simply feeling the sensation of touch, let’s take a moment to appreciate what our bodies do for us. After all, a positive body mindset starts with recognizing our worth, just as we are.

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Ignite Your Purpose and Dominate Your Year

In a world that often encourages us to focus on perceived flaws, it’s easy to fall into the trap of critiquing our own appearance. We begin the day by zeroing in on the areas we’d like to change, whether it’s our waistline, the fine lines on our face, or those little imperfections we wish could disappear. However, what if we shifted our mindset? Instead of starting the day with self-criticism, let’s begin with gratitude for our bodies. Every day, our bodies do incredible things—things we often take for granted, like moving, breathing, and healing. This November, let’s choose to celebrate the strength, mobility, and resilience that we often overlook, acknowledging the everyday blessings of our health and fitness. Whether it’s walking, playing, or simply feeling the sensation of touch, let’s take a moment to appreciate what our bodies do for us. After all, a positive body mindset starts with recognizing our worth, just as we are.

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Wrestling Fear Head On: From Hiding to Thriving

Deflection often arises from a fear of facing uncomfortable situations, such as feelings of shame, embarrassment, or failure. As a pro wrestler, I’ve found myself avoiding confrontations, especially after a performance where things didn’t go as planned. I wanted to hide, but a conversation with a friend changed my perspective. She encouraged me not to dwell but to face the situation head-on with a plan. This shift in mindset helped me overcome my fear and move forward with confidence. The next time you feel the urge to deflect, take a moment to confront the discomfort, prepare for what could go wrong, and move forward with a solid plan. Don’t let fear hold you back—embrace it, face it, and grow stronger from it.

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Mind, Body, and Limits: The Intersection of Fitness and Safety

In a world that constantly demands more from us, setting and asserting boundaries is essential to maintaining personal safety, both physically and emotionally. Whether it’s ensuring our space is respected or protecting our privacy online, boundaries act as a safeguard for our well-being. For example, it’s important to recognize physical boundaries, such as needing personal space or not allowing people to touch us without consent. Emotional boundaries are just as vital, ensuring we don’t give more of ourselves than we can handle, and learning to say no when we feel drained.

Understanding and expressing these boundaries can be uncomfortable at first, but it’s a powerful step toward protecting ourselves. By defining our boundaries and expressing them clearly, we create healthier relationships and environments where our needs are respected. Setting boundaries is an act of self-care, helping us prioritize our mental and physical health, and giving us the strength to enforce limits when necessary.

This journey requires reflection, self-awareness, and trust in our instincts. When something feels off, it often is. By staying true to ourselves and asserting our boundaries, we create safer spaces—mentally, physically, and emotionally—that allow us to thrive in all aspects of our lives.

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From Fear to Faith: Rediscovering God

Starting something new begins with trusting God and facing our true selves—the good, the bad, and everything in between. God calls us to confront our truths with Him, not out of fear, but with faith. By aligning ourselves with God’s Word and reflecting His image, we can grow in trust and face the challenges in our lives. When we see God as a loving Father who comforts us, we embrace a deeper faith that helps us overcome doubt and fear. Trusting in His plan allows us to move forward with confidence and belief in His promises. As we pray, reflect, and believe, we grow closer to His love and truth.

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Confidently Shaping Self-Concepts

Identity is a powerful force that shapes every aspect of who we are and how we interact with the world around us. It is the deep-rooted understanding of ourselves, formed through memories, experiences, relationships, and values, and influences how we behave, think, and perceive others. Often, we look to external sources—like what people say, what we own, or what we do—to define our worth. However, true identity transcends these surface-level markers. It is built from a foundation of self-awareness and is nurtured through the relationships we form, particularly in our formative years.

In understanding who we are, we can begin to recognize the deep influence of our upbringing, especially parenting. The voices of those around us—whether positive or negative—play a significant role in shaping our perceptions and, consequently, our identity. But it’s crucial to remember that identity is not solely defined by external factors; it is also rooted in a spiritual understanding. As John 15:16 beautifully states, we are chosen by the Creator and appointed to live with purpose and impact, long before we begin making moves in the world. When we embrace this truth, we find a deep sense of belonging, love, and worth that is independent of our actions, possessions, or the opinions of others. This revolutionary perspective shifts our identity from a mere reflection of external influences to a powerful realization of who we are at our core.

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