Several studies have pointed to anxiety being hereditary, as well as environmental. An editorial in The American Journal of Psychiatry by Frances Rice Ph.D from 2022 details that recent studies have shown that anxiety and depression diagnosed is caused by approximately 70% genetics and 30% environment. However, the gene to determine mental health has not been discovered, and the data can possibly be skewed, as environmental factors are familial and passed down. For example, your mother yells at you when she is angry and you learn that yelling is how to express anger. Are you angry and unreasonable or did you learn an unhealthy and ineffective coping strategy? You likely learned that behavior, and can unlearn it with support and guidance. Other studies suggest that the younger the child is at the time of diagnosis, the more likely anxiety is due to genetic factors.
So, how do we help our children overcome anxiety when it seems that adults everywhere suffer from the same issues? First, we have to seek out help ourselves. This can be in the form of therapy, meditation, education on the topic, etc. When so much of the future generations’ mental health is dependent on their familial environment, we cannot help unless we model healthy coping strategies in our own homes. Second, we can get support for our
own children by utilizing therapists that work with children and practice healthy coping strategies together. There are several games geared towards assisting even younger children with positively relating to their “big feelings” (overwhelming emotions) that can be useful with children too young to verbalize their thoughts in therapy. In addition, starting to learn coping strategies at a young age is most beneficial for later outcomes.
A tool I used while working with various families that is effective and useful is keeping a list of positive coping strategies on the fridge. This can be a written list or photographs that show actions for preschool aged children. When you or your child are having “big feelings,” you go to the list and pick a strategy to use at that moment. When you use the list, it will model the use of the list for your children while helping you. When your child utilizes the list it helps them and keeps you from reacting emotionally to their feelings, which are often triggering to parents, especially those with mental health concerns like anxiety.
Examples range from diversions and interpersonal or cognitive coping to physical, spiritual, and tension release activities. Some examples of each are breathing deeply for ten breaths, going for a walk or exercise, praying, meditation, making a gratitude list, talking to someone you trust, care for or play with a pet, take a bath, write or draw, and clean or organize your environment. All of these strategies, and many others, can be incredibly helpful in managing anxiety.
