When I think of the word “transition” two things come to mind quickly. The first is as a result of my English degree and adoration for writing where a transition in grammar is a connection (such as a word, clause, or phrase) that brings cohesion to two parts of writing. The second is the process of changing from one location to another, such as graduating from high school to college. However, in the most recent months, I have felt myself undergoing an internal transition, one that was not requested or desired: The urge to push into an unfamiliar direction, away from the comfort of my normal circumstances and methods of operation (done mostly out of fear and anxiety) and into a new level of faith.
I have a personal phrase that I tend to live by and repeat often in almost every given circumstance: “I’ll figure it out”. It has become so much a part of my daily motto that my own father told me he plans to make sure that when I pass that phrase is written on my tombstone in my memory. Some people have told me that phrase motivates them to persevere in trying and challenging situations, as they remember that they too can strive to “figure out” their difficult circumstances as well. However, it’s actually a self-afflicting, burdening phrase that thrusts a lot of unnecessary weight on my own shoulders.
In this season, I find myself struggling to veer away from the concept of figuring everything out in my own strength and relying more on the faith that everything will work itself out as I walk in steps that have already been ordered for me. Relinquishing control is not my strong suite in any fashion. It is scary. I often feel as though the only person I can trust, rely, and depend on to fulfill responsibilities is my own self and often feel that my concerns are valid because I have been let down in the past by people who I thought would never disappoint me. Still, to think that I always succeed at everything accurately and without fail is prideful. The truth is that regardless of how dependable I feel that I am, we were never meant to walk this earth alone.
We are all members of one body on earth; An eye cannot tell an ear that it does not have an important place on the body because without the ear, how can one hear? We all have significance, and we all need one another to function properly and to succeed. Transitioning into becoming the person that I am called to be, a woman who uplifts, encourages, and partners with others to bring glory to my Creator, is challenging but vital to my personal growth and success and therefore is welcomed wholeheartedly. So, I welcome this shift; I appreciate the opportunity for change, and I accept the challenge of evolving into an even greater woman of God. I trust that the rewards for my obedience will supersede the hesitation of my transition.